Feeling 'Meh', Plus Size Positivity & Fave YouTubers. #10

Ohhhh hey.

I'm still not in the proper swing of blogging am I. Its so difficult for me to post every week because I'm such a 'write when I feel like it' person. I realise this isn't ideal for a blog but fuck it for now. I'm doing it when I wan't to and when it doesn't feel forced and I aint' mad at it. 

I wanted to talk a bit in this post about feeling 'meh'. I know I'm not the only one who just gets in a bit of a rut or a bit of a shit place and doesn't feel happy in general. I wouldn't say I feel sad or even that down. Its just 'Meh'. 

   I'm hoping that makes sense to someone reading this because I'm gonna' bang on about it for a while. This feeling is the number one cause of me swaying slightly off my diet, amongst so much other stuff. I haven't been super bad this week. I had one night during the week where I decided to eat 4 chocolate digestives and 2 bags of crisps in one evening so hurrah Aym, well done for that one. The rest of the week has just been ok. I've probably gone over syns a few more times than I think I did and thats the number 1 cause of meaning no loss this week and that usually throws me off and I forget the diet for the next few weeks and just put on everything I lost. Jesus this sounds mad, I'm definitely not the only one who does this am I? 

I'm really not allowing it to spill into this week. I've been super strict today and am not going to let the slack behaviour carry on even if I don't lose anything on weigh-day tomorrow. I'm not expecting to lose anything, I'm reaaaally hoping its not a gain because that would be super shit. If it is, I'm going to suck it up, accept it and carry on. Its so hard to not let it beat you down. When I feel beat down I'll treat myself to a McDonalds to cheer myself up. The logic there is just hilarious. No more of that, I can do this. 

If you know me, its not a secret that I'm obsessed with YouTube. I watch so much of it and have so many faves. My faves will vary from month to month but right now I'm obsessed with Louise Pentland's weekly vlogs, I just love her honesty, she is so unapologetic about sleeping in her makeup or having extra flab on her arms and I love it. She's recently had a baby and has through the whole pregnancy and after birth been super open and honest about her experiences and as someone who's never had a baby, I find that quite refreshing. A lot of the new mum experiences on YouTube and Social Media are very sugar coated I find, so its nice to watch a weekly and not feel like someone is putting on a show for anyone. So I'd advise checking those vlogs out if you're looking for some new people to watch because I think she's fab. 

                         Another recent fave is a YouTuber called Sarah Rae Vargas. She's fucking hilarious, I could listen to her talk allll day, she has so many 'story time' type videos and I love putting them on in the background and just listen to her talk. She's a plus size gal, films a shit load of fashion and underwear hauls which I think is so unbelievably empowering to women who are a bit bigger or have lots of body hang ups etc. Watching her hauls and try-on videos just make me feel good, because she feels good and oozes confidence. She had 2 babies within a year, I saw her video on this and that's how I became hooked on her videos. I'd recommend 100%. 

                     

On the topic of plus size YouTubers and all that body positivity and body confidence stuff etc, I'm so all for it, I wish I could embrace the size I am and be happy, I wish I could just work it and not care but the truth is even if I didn't care an inch what anyone else thought, I'd still not like how I looked and at the end of the day, that's all it is about right? It's about what makes you happy and feel good. I know being a bit smaller will take a weight off my mind. Pun intended. I can't guarantee that dropping a few stone will solve all my problems but I do know that it'll help. It'll definitely mean I'm healthier and that can only be a good thing.

I'm feeling good about the rest of the week. A little bit nervous for tomorrows weigh day but lets just get it over and done with and I'll post the results on my page tomorrow as I promised myself I'd continue doing. I've also been posting some meals up over on my Instagram so follow follow follow me. pls. 

Love, 

Ayme's world. 

Wisdom of the week: buy a rice cooker because they are so fucking good and make cooking rice as easy as cooking pasta.